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How to Start a Dating Profile That Actually Gets Messages

May 16, 2025 · 3 min read
How to Start a Dating Profile That Actually Gets Messages

Let’s face it—starting a dating profile can feel like creating a résumé for your love life. And yet, many people rush through it, wonder why no one’s replying, and assume online dating "doesn't work."

The truth? It does work—but only if your profile is doing the heavy lifting.

If you want to stand out, attract real connections, and actually get messages, here’s how to create a dating profile that gets attention (the right kind).


✅ 1. Use a Clear, Recent, and Friendly Photo

Your photo is your first impression—make it count.

Tips:

  • Use a recent picture (within the last year).

  • Make sure your face is clearly visible—no sunglasses, no group shots.

  • Smile. Seriously. It makes you look approachable.

  • Avoid over-editing or filters. Authenticity wins.

Bonus: Add 2–3 additional photos showing your lifestyle (traveling, with pets, doing a hobby). This gives people conversation starters.


🖊️ 2. Write a Bio That’s Specific, Not Generic

We’ve all seen it:

“I love to laugh. Looking for someone real.”

That doesn’t say anything. Instead, be specific and personal.

Better Example:

"Weekend hikes, bad puns, and home-cooked pasta are my love language. Looking for someone who can beat me at Mario Kart (or at least try)."

Tips:

  • Share what makes you you.

  • Avoid clichés like “laid back,” “easygoing,” or “love to travel” unless you expand on them.

  • Keep it upbeat, but honest.


🧲 3. Include Conversation Hooks

Make it easy for someone to message you.

Good conversation hooks:

  • "Currently reading: ___"

  • "Unpopular opinion: ___"

  • "The best date idea I’ve ever heard was: ___"

These prompt curiosity and give others something to respond to besides “Hey.”


🚩 4. Skip the Negativity

Avoid listing what you don’t want ("No drama," "No cheaters," etc.). It can come off as bitter or closed off.

Instead, frame your standards in a positive way:

“I really value kindness, consistency, and people who can laugh at themselves.”


🧠 5. Be Honest—but Showcase Your Best Self

You don’t have to reveal everything upfront—but you do want to be truthful about the basics (age, location, lifestyle).

Tip: Focus on your best traits, but stay grounded.

  • Yes: “I love learning new things and making people laugh.”

  • No: “I’m the smartest person you’ll ever meet.”


🎯 6. Fill Out Every Section (If Possible)

Most dating apps or sites let you share your:

  • Interests

  • Job

  • Education

  • Hobbies

  • Preferences

Why it matters: The more info you include, the more likely people are to find common ground—and message you.


📬 Final Tip: Be Active (and Patient)

Once your profile is set up, don’t ghost it. Log in regularly, respond to messages thoughtfully, and don’t be discouraged if things start slow.

Like anything worth doing, great connections take a little effort and a little time.

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